When a Mother feels helpless the Most...

I truly feel that mothers feel the most helpless when there child is sick & cant figure out what to do to make them feel better. I can honestly say I do...Paetyn started feeling a little warm at the hospital last wed when we were getting our Ultra sound for Ashton to see if he was measuring small or not. We got her home & did not think anymore of it because she was running around doing fine until around dinner... She would not eat anything which is actually very normal for her the little skinny minny! After dinner I noticed all the symptoms catching up with her.. All around her eyes were sunk in and they were glossy and she all of a sudden lost all energy the poor thing! I gave her some Tylenol and she came & snuggled with me & fell right asleep! She does not snuggle she has always had tonz of energy but I cant help but love when she is sick because I finally do get to snuggle with her!! Ryan kept asking me if I wanted him to put her in her crib & I said no because I felt so bad I did not notice it earlier & I just hated seeing her this way it just broke my heart! Well finally hours later I decided to put her in her crib and she stayed asleep but Ryan & I were up through the night trying to keep this fever broken.. She was in so much pain you could just see it in her eyes:( Thursday came along & we literally sat on the love sac all day and put movies in that I knew would keep her attention so she would just relax and take it easy.. Again I loved just being able to cudle you Paetyn and just kiss your little head all day!! Thursday night came along and she was still so miserable! Grandma Smith finally got home late that night and we took her upstairs to her and have her check her out! Grandma had to look in her ears and her throat and holding Paetyn down while she crys her eyes out I just cant do! I know I have to think of it as helping her out but it hurts to see her cry so hard.. I just could not do it and had to have Ryan hold her down as I just tried to hold her hand and tell her it would be alright!! Her ears looked fine and her throat was a little red but other then that we were not sure. Grandma said tom morning she would swab her throat for strep throat and see if that was it because they have been seeing that allot lately and that could be it! So the next morning you were acting allot happier and eating better! So we decided to not do the strep test because your throat did not seem to be bothering you! Today you were up and down though still very needy and wanting to be held. Grandma Smith watched you while daddy and I went to our 2pm stress test visit.. Carly brought Lilah and Cassy over and you were so excited to see them but really only wanted to be held by grandma! We finally got home 3hrs later and you were taking a nap... You woke up a little later and I was so happy to see you.. Saturday morning Daddy woke up early to take Grandma & Grandpa to the airport because they were leaving for Hawaii for the week but dad got home before either of us had woken up! When you woke up this was the day your dad & I will always remember! Today you wanted to be held and nothing we did would ever make you happy! You cried all day long and we tried everything to keep you happy. We walked around the block and you held daddy's and I's hand and you loved that it was so cute! Still you just kept pointing and getting mad and angry and upset! We walked to the park and watched a little girls soccer game and you loved watching the ball.. You kept saying ball..ball.. It was so good to see you happy for just a minute! It was getting cold & late so daddy ran home to get the car while we stayed and watched the rest of the game.. Daddy showed up to pick us up and we decided to go get Thai food which we know you would usually eat and we were hoping we could get ya to eat in this situation.. I got my prego craving and saw the italian ice & Gilato resturaunt and decided to stop there while we were waiting for our food to be done. We got Blueberry Gilato and Watermelon and Cotton Candy Italian Ice cream.. Mmm it was good and you loved it!! We got ya home and you ate a good amount of rice we were quite surprised. We got ya in your jammies and brushed your teeth and read you a book and put ya in your bed you were looking so tired so we thought you might go down with out crying but we were wrong. You cried and cried dad & I hated hearing you cry but we thought from all that happened today maybe you were past the point of being tired so we thought you needed to just cry it out so we went up stairs because we can't listen to you cry it breaks daddy and I's hearts. So we were sitting on the couch and daddy decided to look up on his phone how long should you let your child cry yourself to sleep... We got talking and reading some of the storys made us just feel really bad and your cry tonight was not like your usual cry it was a scream a really bad scream so we decided to go get you and take you to the Riverwoods Instacare to have ya checked out to make sure all was okay. We got there and filled out paperwork and sat and waited to be seen... The Dr came in and we kinda expressed our concerns and he asked me to hold ya down so he could check your throat but I just could not do it I am already pregnant and at my wit ends on what to do and am an emotional bascket case and did not want to be the one that held you down and watched you cry so I had your daddy do it!! It just brings tears to my eyes watching you have to go through all of this! Your throat did seem to be a little red but not swolen and then he checked your ears and those were quite red he said.. Looks like you came down with an ear infection after finishing up with that virus you had!! We were relieved to find out something was wrong and that we were getting a perscription to get rid of this nasty ear infection that had made you so sad and upset the last couple days. We hurried to the Provo Wallgreen's which is the only wallgreen's that is 24hrs to fill this sucker! Ooh my was it busy.. It seemed like everyone and there dog was there to fill a perscription at the same time! So we tried to keep you distracted by everything in the store until ours was done.. Finally it was done and we started heading home at 10:30pm.. Way past your bedtime and we were all soo tired! We hurried and got your first dose in ya while we were driving home! The Dr told us it would take atleast 24-48hrs to kick in which seemed like a century to us... The next morning I woke up and hurried to give you your 2nd dose of medication! Today you seemed to be a little happier and we were so excited to see a little bit of our little girl come back to us! We skyped with Aaron & Jess this morning and told them to come down and see us and we would find something to do! Later on that day they showed up and it was a georgous day so we decided to go see the horses and go to a park to get your mind off everything.. You loved the horses you kept saying horse.. horse and loved petting them it was so cute and we got some cute pictures too.. Then we decided to head off to the wood park in PG... We got there and boy was it busy but not surprising on a great warm day like this! You had no idea what to think of all these kids running all over the place.. As we started walking into the park more we spotted Aunt Mindy, Chase, Parker, Mary and Jeff accrossed the way! We could not believe it so Uncle Aaron snuck up on them and started taking pics but Chase spotted him and we all started lauphing and could not believe we ran into them! So we hung out with them while at the park and you and Parker had a blast! You did not like the swings at all.. But you loved the slide.. Daddy, Aaron and Jess kept taking you down them and we snapped tonz of cute photos.. I could tell though just by looking at you you were still not feeling well:( This was just taking your mind off it all for the moment but you could tell you were still in allot of pain! It was getting late and getting cooler so we decided to take off. We got ya in the car and on the way home you started getting angry and sad so I fed you fruit snacks to give us some time till we got home! We get home and start making some dinner and get your medicine in ya.. This is really embarrassing but dad notice when I was giving you your medicine that I had only been giving you 1ML instead of 1tsp lol!! I know I know can we say prego brain and the fact that it was dark the night I gave you your first dose in the car and all I saw was the 1 lol!! Wow did I feel bad.. So these past 2 doses I had only given you 1/2 tsp.. Well duh mom!! I felt so bad after all this time I was so happy to get it in you but come to find out I was not even giving you the right amount I felt soo bad!! What a stupid mistake.. So dad gave you the right amount and the rest of the night I could not get that off my mind I felt soo terrible!! On Monday though we had our little girl back it was such a relief!! Daddy & I were so happy to see you smiling and running around the house saying dog, puppy, horse, hi and by and all those other words you say through out the day! We missed our happy talkative little girl. We appreciate your cute adorable personality now after this whole exp.. This was by far one of the hardest things your daddy and I had to see you go through bugs!! We love you so much and dont want to see you ever hurt like that.. It was a huge relief for mommy to see you so happy again and for me to be able to make you lauph and play with you!! I love you so much my sweet little girl and today was your last day on your medicine and we are so thrilled and daddy and I decided to put ya into a bubble so you never have to go through that again lol.. Just kidding but we wish we could ha ha...